Angel Rodriguez

So, he left you before you could leave him. Or it was mutual, but you’re still sad. Or you broke up with him, because it wasn’t working out. Either way, you’re heartbroken. You doubt yourself. Maybe you act like everything’s okay, but deep down it’s not. And any additional complication in your life, big or small, can make you explode.

Whether you were together for three months, or three years, breakups suck. Here are a few tips for getting over your ex.

1. Depend on your friends.

Seriously, friends are so good for things like this. Especially if they are combined with your favourite dessert and movie marathons (though of course, skip super lovey-dovey ones, like “The Notebook.”

2. Exercise!

Not to burn off the Ben and Jerry’s you just ate, but because exercise helps you produce endorphins that make you feel better. A good workout can help you de-stress. Exercising with friends is even better!

3. Hide anything he has ever given you.

Ladies, you’re not going to get over your man any faster if you’re still wearing his t-shirt to sleep, or cuddling the teddy bear he bought you for Valentine’s day, or reading the crappy book of poetry he wrote you. I’m not saying destroy it, just hide it somewhere where you can’t see it on a regular basis.

4. Avoid the radio.

DO NOT LISTEN TO “YOUR SONG.” And while you’re at it, don’t read passages about him in your diary. Just try to avoid things that would remind you of him for a while. Yes, you guys have some great memories together, but you have great memories without him as well, and there will be many more.

5. DO NOT STALK HIM ONLINE.

Yes, I know you want to check his Facebook and check to make sure he’s still as miserable as you are. But seriously, don’t do it. You may not like what you see. Delete him from Facebook for a while. If it was an amicable breakup he’ll understand and won’t take it personally. And if it wasn’t amicable then why bother being virtual friends with him?

6. Girl-power anthems are your friends!

Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” is a must to add to your “Single (For Now) And Loving It” playlist. That’s the only prerequisite. Feel free to throw in Christina Aguilera’s “Beautiful” and blast it while you’re showering. Belt it out. Even if you can’t sing.

7. Put a picture of him on your wall and throw darts at it.

This is pretty self explanatory.

8. Meditate.

And no, I don’t mean sit on the ground with your legs crossed humming strangely. Unless that works for you, I guess. But right after a breakup, you will probably be thinking about things, wondering “What did I do wrong?” and “When did it start falling apart?” Those questions will drive you to do crazy things if you let them continue to plague you. So, clear your head. Breathe deeply.

9. Give Yourself a Hand (Literally)

I wouldn’t suggest hooking up with someone else if you’re not completely over your ex, but keeping sexual energy pent up isn’t going to help the situation. So if you have it, release it.

10. Cry.

At some point you’re going to feel tired of crying. You’re going to want to hold your tears back and “be a big girl.” But again, no need to keep pent up energy inside of you. If you need to cry, cry. You’ll probably find you feel a lot better afterward.

11. Look cute.

You might just want to put on your pajamas and sleep until next week, but looking cute boosts confidence. And that’s what you need right now. Even if you don’t necessarily dress in your cutest outfit, pretty underwear always makes you feel secretly sexy. Don’t deny it.

12. Give it time.

You’re not going to feel better tomorrow. I know that sucks, but it’s true. These things take time. And by the way, there is no rule on how long it will take. Everyone’s different.

Rule of thumb: if you think, I’m over it, so I can check his Facebook now, YOU’RE NOT OVER IT. When you’re over it, you won’t even be thinking about it. It’s when he doesn’t occupy a constant space in your head, that’s when your heart has healed.